pinkomenace.com

The Burning Man before (left) and after (right) it's true

identity was revealed.

Burning man is something that takes place every year in the Black Rock desert north of Reno, Nevada (Reno is best known as the place where "Reno 911" is set).  Many people involved with Silicon Valley attend this event and generally use it as an excuse to show off their artistic and technological skills.  The atmosphere is somewhat Woodstock-like, so many things are tolerated and encouraged that would not be acceptable in normal society.  This may sound like a fun time of computer hacking, optional clothing, and possibly other semi-legal activities, but pinkomenace.com believes that this could actually be a small-scale experiment in Communism.

According to Siliconvalleywatcher.com, during the burning man event, "there is no commercial activity at all. You can buy ice and coffee at the central camp and that is all."  Additionally, there are no commercial messages or sponsorships.  This article goes on to say,  "The radio stations [that they set up during the festival] have no advertisements. People cover up the brand names on moving vans.  In many ways, the Burning Man culture mirrors the proto-communist, Digger-like cultures of the geek software engineering community and its celebration of open-source, sharing, and distrust of leaders."

So, yes it sounds like they lean toward being Commie Pinkos at Burning Man based on their economic principles.  At least they allow people freedom of expression and a general atmosphere of "do whatever you want"...  Or do they?  According to wikipedia.com, they've instituted the following totalitarian rules.   We've listed our responses after each one.

• An imposed curved grid street structure. -  In addition to making the Burning Man city hard to drive on unless you also drive for NASCAR, the roads cleverly mirror the curved sickle of the Soviet Union.
  
• A speed limit of 5 mph (8 km/h).  - 5 mph?  Soviet or not, no one wants to drive slower than you can easily jog.
  
• A ban on driving, except for approved "mutant vehicles" and service vehicles. - one would wonder why anyone would want to drive considering the imposed speed restriction.
  
• Restrictions and imposing of safety standards on mutant vehicles. -If you can't have a dangerous "mutant vehicles" what is the point really?
• A ban on campfires and Tiki torches. - Unless you are burning the US constitution or Magna Carta apparently.  Also, who doesn't like Tiki Torches?  Communists apparently.
  
• Burning your own art must be done on an approved burn platform. -While we don't necessarily disagree with burning your own art - especially since most of the art at Burning Man is most likely Communist-themed - we believe you should be able to burn your, or anyone else's, art wherever you want.
• A ban on fireworks. - Really?  In a giant desert?
• A ban on firearms. - The first thing most dictators do is to disarm the population in order to discourage and easily put down revolt.  It's odd that a festival called "Burning Man" would have so many rules against fire and explosives.
  
• A ban on dogs. - Dogs would warn against suprise inspections by the Burning Man Secret Police, so they are obviously not allowed.

Left: The Burning Man "Temple of Joy"

Right: The "Temple of Joy" set on fire, most likely by Communists.  Apparently these Communists have no problem burning things relating to people's hapiness.

Interestingly, Google founders Sergey Brin (whom although not necessarily a Communist, was born in Russia and has been referred to suspiciously as an “Enlightenment Man," by the Economist Magazine) and Larry Page are rumored to attend this event on a regular basis.  Although there are no sponsorships, participation is expected out of all atendees.  Because of this fact, they and thus Google most likely supports this festival in some way. 

Additionally, Google's informal corporate motto is "Don't be evil".  Although this sounds good on the surface, why would anyone have to state this unless either they are evil by nature, or they believe that most corporations are actually evil.  Joseph Stalin also held this belief about corporations.

That being said, if you got here through a Google search or are friends with Sergey or Larry, please forget you read the last two paragraphs and instead tell them and all your friends how great and Google-friendly this page is.