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As seen in the following post on YouTube, the Russians have developed laser weapons capable of destroying American missiles or planes inbound to the Russian Motherland.  As there is no English translation to this footage (possibly because it was stolen from KGB HQ), Americans should definitely be concerned about what the Pinkos intend to do with this weapon.

 Yeah, we've got lasers too!

Some observers may know that the US has been working on laser weapons for several years now.  The referenced test took place in 1997 and even targeted a satellite orbiting above earth.  Lately, however, US intentions have largely been aimed at petty squabbles with the Chinese.  Most likely these minor fights regard satellite TV access (reportedly, Chinese diplomats have threatened to shoot down satellites if new episodes of Gilmore Girls or Sex in the city are produced).  Americans happily obliged on this request, but a weapon to counter this threat was required if other shows like "Family Guy" or "Monday Night Football" were ever threatened.
 

Bzzzt, Bwoowoo, wooiiik! Buzuau!

Just as American lasers are largely peaceful, Russian satellites have a much more sinister purpose than simply protecting us from terrible TV shows. This can be seen in the dialog pertaining to this video (as of 10/16/09) between Russian and American citizens:

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7777serg####:

@andrewm15####

My friend. While you spend money for your useless rockets and system ABOUT. We already have such development which allow us without effort will cope with your system of protection. Our technologies of rocket production advance your progress. I consider, that this all is unnecessary! You will destroy yourselves the way of life.

andrewm15####:

No, we developed many layers of defense. You are thinking of more recently. We have anti ballistic missiles all over the world, including by russia.

andrewm15####:

first of all, we probably would survive all of the nukes because we would destroy them before they even leave russia. I was just talking worst case scenario.

No russian nuke can get past our many of defenses. When a russian scientist says that it can get past our defense, he is only referring to ONE of our defenses.

Russia would become the 51st state of America in less than a month.

sho####:

it doesn' t matter how much USA spend on their army, RUSSIA always finds a cheaper and better alternative to all american technologies. Russia has the strongest army becouse of that USA is trying to avoid the direct war with Russia. Try to think a little and you will understand.

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Apparently Russian technology is already able to bypass US defenses.  Although disturbing by itself, specially frightening is the Russian claim that they "has the strongest army".  We assume sho#### means Russia's regular army by itself.  Combine this with Russia's cat army, and they could be a truly unstoppable force.

It is also possible, although somewhat unlikely that andrewm15####'s comments to these assumed KGB agents could be the thing that pushes Russia over the edge between a cold war and nuclear annihilation. Although we admire andewm15####'s confidence in the American military, our nation would benefit from an enduring peace.